Caged but free.

  A couple weeks ago when the weather was not this hot we, my family and I had the opportunity to visit Jamunkhadi Simsar; a community’s effort towards forest area and wetland conservation at the same time also uplifting the community economically.

road car trees on side

On the way

caged_but_free_img_20170802_1441251314041429.jpg

Reached

bridge across the huge lake

Suspension or hanging bridge

deer area

Deer area .

deer area.

deer area.

Jamunkhadi-Jhapa Ariel Drone footage

There were many animals some were relatively more free than others in terms of area they could move around freely in but they were all caged. it cannot be denied we had a nice time there. On the way back, however, I kept remembering lines from the poem;

“Caged Bird”
~Maya Angelou~

A free bird leaps
on the back of the wind
and floats downstream
till the current ends
and dips his wing
in the orange sun rays
and dares to claim the sky.

But a bird that stalks
down his narrow cage
can seldom see through
his bars of rage
his wings are clipped and
his feet are tied
so he opens his throat to sing.

The caged bird sings
with a fearful trill
of things unknown
but longed for still
and his tune is heard
on the distant hill
for the caged bird
sings of freedom.

The free bird thinks of another breeze
and the trade winds soft through the sighing trees
and the fat worms waiting on a dawn bright lawn
and he names the sky his own

But a caged bird stands on the grave of dreams
his shadow shouts on a nightmare scream
his wings are clipped and his feet are tied
so he opens his throat to sing.

The caged bird sings
with a fearful trill
of things unknown
but longed for still
and his tune is heard
on the distant hill
for the caged bird
sings of freedom.

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on and off topic

More often than not I have a concrete outlook of what I want, armed with the rough draft in my notebook that I wrote before I sit in front of my laptop to type. The rough draft makes sure I don’t stray from my idea just work to make it better with every word I add or subtract. However for a couple of weeks, I get up with an aim to write but all I end up doing is staring at my open notebook and empty, blank screen of my laptop.

Which I have come to know is very harmful to the personal well-being and for the thing called pride. Going off topic, a very important person of my life told me and I agree fully that pride is a positive emotion whereas jealousy and vanity are negatives and for sure should always be kept far. Doing nothing is bad but being made aware every second by the blank word document is worse. A point comes when despite doing everything to get motivated you can’t seem to do the task you should be doing for your own self. When I feel disheartened I begin to question my ability which is not a good sign because I would be sadder and the cycle will continue on and on. I have a list of topics I would like to write on however words have failed me recently.
Again off topic, I have a small room 11*6 feet when I am uncertain or disturbed, with music playing; I

  1. reorganize my room
  2. reorganize my almari (wardrobe )
  3. refashion my clothes
  4. make art and crafts.

I just need to do one of the above like by reorganizing my room I somehow reorganize my haphazard thoughts. What do you do to help the mental or emotional aspect of yourself??? Just doing one of the above has always been enough to stabilize and push my thoughts back on track and break through the wall of procrastination but not this time everything is done yet I can’t seem to perform my day the way I want sometimes I just think I am lazy then again I quickly dismiss that stupid negative thought.
Writing is very important for me I cannot emphasize on this point enough. It is not just as a way of self-expression for me but my identity, a source of pride and happiness for my family after I became disabled my life took a completely different path and writing for me became that shining pearl in the setting sun, one was never enough.
Again going off topic but does this writing have any topic, thank you for reading this nonsense as I thought just now to dump all my all my clothes from my almari and rearrange it again.. maybe I’ll invent a new me.

girl coverd in color staring blankly ahead

The Queer journey of life

 

Life was simple then. There was no need to be happy or sad after all we were all just kids. Friendship knew no boundaries – rich, poor, caste, colour or disabilities. A mere rupee was not just a rupee but the cause of smiles worth millions. A building or a tree was just not what it seemed or intended for, maybe it was a haunted castle, a witch or an unconquerable mountain everything depended on how vast the imagination was. A rustle of the leaf could be the beginning of invention of horrific stories and proven facts would be mostly denied on a whim. Everything the grownups did was weird for they were stuck up weirdoes. Everything and every job were awesome, all was easy and attainable. There was no care; life was easy, fun for we were kids then unknown to what the future brings. Continue reading