#my story

 

There are numerous benefits of education and equally many critics exist too but that’s the discussion I will gladly leave out today. Today I will only acknowledge the good of education, especially in my context. At the time I fell ill and realized I had now to live with a disability; I had only completed 12 Std and was preparing for the medical entrance examination. My confidence, self-esteem, self-image was all time low. The journey ahead was dark and gloomy. I could not even toss and turn on my own, my mother a graduate and baba(father) an M.Com and MBA degree holder became my full-time carer feeding me, bathing me changing my clothes, carrying me to the toilet and doing everything for me but I never heard an uff! From them, in fact, they defended me when people said my life was now over. My elder brother was in medical school and being the daughter of this wonderfully positive, optimistic, educated family  I had promised myself I will get a bachelors’ degree when or how I didn’t know I just knew I had to. 

That determination became stronger when after coming home from the hospital I first did hold a pen and I couldn’t even draw a straight line it took literally years of practice. I somehow found the courage and did my bachelors I couldn’t even write for long without pain and I had a different walking stick then but I did complete it. The knowledge gained and that piece of paper, the degree changed my total outlook toward myself and life. Today what you see is a totally different Srijana than the old one. 

So I figured if one degree can do so much for me then why not stick to my original plan of being a doctor so today I’m on my path to give my exam for master of sociology starting on 5th Dec, my birthday and ending on 18th  I hope I do well on all my papers for which I have to study and for that I have to take a small  break from the blog.

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Every dog has its day

In Nepal, the festival of light also known as Diwali is called Tihar. Similar to other Diwali observances, lamps are lit at night during Tihar, but it also has its observances that make our’s so unique. The festival of lights celebrates the triumph of light over darkness, of knowledge over ignorance, and the dissolution of barriers that separate humans from the authentic experience of the world. Nepalese Hinduism is unique in dedicating the second day of Tihar, Kukur Tihar, to the worship of dogs.

So today we celebrate kukur Tihar we thank them for their companionship, faithfulness, love and for everything thing they bring to our lives.

img_20171018_090529-1022766653.jpgimg_20171018_09014492432316.jpgimg_20171018_0905241196636131.jpg

black=Julie, brown=Hira. Both females both previously street dogs both now family. Julie is 8 years we found her in the month July as a pup hence the name. Hira came home as a little pup and never went back.

gender perspictive on development-a thought

Simone Lucie Ernestine Marie Bertrand de Beauvoir a French writer, intellectual, existentialist philosopher, political activist, feminist and social theorist. She wrote in her book “ The second sex”  “….one is not born rather becomes a woman …it  is the civilization as a whole that produces this creature intermediate between male and eunuch, which is described as feminine “

 Though there is no denying that women constitute nearly half of the world’s population, however, they own only about 6%of the world’s wealth. What seems to escape our minds while dividing the fruits of development or we choose to forget about women’s participation; whose time, energy, effort, and skills are involved in every aspect of a developmental process though she may or may not be directly involved.In many cases, gender is seen closely related to the roles and status given to men and women in the society based on their sexual differences.

 Gender inequality is a form of inequality distinct from any type of social and economic inequality nonetheless gender inequality form the basis of all societal evils.

Much of the ideas of feminism and women in development, formed during/in the UN, the decade of women (1976-85)” equality, development, and peace” was the slogan at the international women’s year conference held in Mexico City in 1975.

Birds of flood

During the floods that hit parts of Nepal recently caused by the heavy rainfall a pair of new birds visited my home.They built their nest on one of the Beatle tree’s of my home, a clear view from my window.


 

All the photos I take are from my phone so the quality may be bad .These days I am doing my assignments so haven’t been able to check any blog or am late replying to you for which I am truly sorry.

all about me

 

That’s Dorian Grey?  It’s the 100th time now, said my friend with very apparent exaggeration and a genuine look of disgust. This, however, was a ruse to recommend me the latest book she was reading, a love story, “Me before you” by Jojo Moyes. I don’t mind rereading and genres don’t concern me. Hence I thought I’d give it a chance but I don’t trust her taste therefore when it wasn’t available for free on the world wide web and with talks going on for turning it into a movie I skipped buying it telling her I’ll watch the movie and telling myself I’ll hold on to my money for now.

That was in 2013 and I had forgotten all about it until one fine day in 2017 the internet informed me of the movie and I watched it.

“Me before you” is a romance novel first published on January 2012. Although it may seem realistic, the book is a work of fiction, a romantic story of a wealthy man with disability Will Traynor and his caregiver Louisa Clark, living amid the people who try to convince him not to take his own life; they fail and he dies. It is an “autobiographical” account of Will after he has been quadriplegic since a road accident several years earlier. The plot is the same in the film.  In one of the scene, he says, “I get that this could be a good life, but it’s not my life. I can’t be the sort of man who accepts this.” Since throughout the movie Will is shown to be strong, determined and uncompromising, it seems clear that the “sort of man” who would put up with a paralyzed body and its demands could only be inferior to him. The idea that it is better to be dead than live with disabilities has been showcased many times.  Like in Million Dollar Baby, Whose Life Is It Anyway?, The Sea Inside and etc. Television Film Theater all seems to love those individuals who want to die; they’re less keen to cover the rest “who want to live”.

When able people talk about suicide, they’re discouraged, offered prevention, psychiatric support because then suicide is never seen as desirable. When a person with disability talks of it, suddenly the conversation is overtaken with words like ‘choice’  ‘autonomy’ ‘freedom’ ‘out of love’ and people rush to uphold these prized principles then the talk of prevention and mental health support are rare. What kind of message is this since when did suicide become ok?

It’s said only the injured can understand the pain of the wounded, do we really need be injured to understand the right to life of the person with disabilities.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

dead

 

It’s always hard trying to come to terms with it, once a person is born Death is decided we know the truth of the mortal nevertheless we cry,  grief,  tears it’s the love we give but the other can’t receive in spite knowing it all each Death we see is difficult even if its 100th   we’ve encountered.

 We ask questions beginning or with sentences ending with why as we struggle to breathe. We often weep in despair, silently: sometimes offering ourselves as the replacement because a life without them is unimaginable. A heart raging in the fire of questions with tears that hurt with the flow; later the same heart tries to console.

 And soon… It might have taken years but no matter how long it’s always too soon for Death to come.

Again tears flow but not silently lamenting the tragedy sometimes screaming but the Dead cannot hear can they?

It’s said time heals all wounds but recollections of the pain remain. A few days, months, years slip by and still, the memories of the Dead follow everywhere. Willingly or not, the place the Dead formally had in our life is or will be taken by someone else not wholly maybe, in a part.

The Dead is still missed we smile laugh, cry for no reason and visit memory lane countless times. Death is Strange, knowing your loved one is dying is Stranger. However, the truth prevails “once a person is born Death is certain” though it is for certain the most painful truth.

on the calamity caused by recent rain, flood in Nepal. It is trivial to complain in the face of death but there was no electricity yesterday hence could not post.

 

 

Dignified & Correct terminologies- words are powerful

Words have an immense power they can easily make or break a person. A word is very powerful and we often underestimate its power.
Of late I have been reading a lot of blogs describing people with disability as “differently able” which angers me a lot because I want to be referred to as person first not different because I have a disability. This is my opinion and opinions are not facts that can’t be proved wrong.

While addressing people with disabilities, knowingly or unknowingly, many of us use undignified and incorrect terminologies. These words will play a negative impact on both the personal and professional development of people with disabilities. This got me thinking there must be data for correct and dignified terminology, here are some I found;

 

Incorrect (out-dated, undignified ) Correct (Dignified)
  • ·         Handicapped, Disabled, Abnormal, Differently Able, special
 

Persons with Disabilities, People with Disability

 

  • ·         Normal Person, Healthy Person
Person without Disability
  • ·         Crippled, Lame, invalid
Person with Physical Disability
  • ·         Blind
Person who is Blind, Visually Impaired Person
  • ·         Deaf, Mute, tongue-tied
Person who is deaf, Person with Hearing Impairments, Person who is unable to speak, non-verbal
  • ·         Wheelchair bound, confined or restricted to a wheelchair
Person who uses a wheelchair, wheelchair user
  • ·         Crazy, Insane, Psycho, Mentally ill
Person with Psychiatric disability, emotional disorder, behavior disorder, person with mental illness
  • ·         Mentally Retarded, Retarded, Slow, Idiot, mentally defective, moron, slow, imbecile, feeble-minded, Down’s person
Person with Intellectual Disabilities
   

*THIS IS NO WAY  AN EXSUSTIVE LIST  please see

http://www.cpdusu.org/about/committee/awareness/

http://www.nfdn.org.np/advocacy-documents/dignified-terminologies-pwds.html

http://www.courts.ca.gov/partners/documents/7-terminology.pdf

http://nda.ie/Publications/Attitudes/Appropriate-Terms-to-Use-about-Disability/

http://www.onestops.info/article.php?article_id=14

http://www.miusa.org/sites/default/files/documents/resource/Respectful%20Disability%20Language.pdf

Things to remember

  • Individuals with disabilities are people!
  • Individuals with disabilities are whole people!
  • They expect to be treated with the same dignity and respect that you do.
  • Just because someone has a disability does not mean he/she is disabled.

Disability vs. Handicap

A disability is a condition caused by such things as an accident or trauma, disease, or genetics that limits a person’s vision, hearing, speech, mobility, or mental function.
A handicap is a constraint imposed upon a person, regardless of that person’s ability or disability. These constraints can be physical or attitudinal. For example, stairs and curbs are handicaps imposed on those who use wheelchairs.
Always remember that the person is not the condition. Keep all your speech person focused, not disability focused.

We live we learn but most importantly we learn for life is always changing always evolving.